They Don’t Have Ducks in Montana?

They Don’t Have Ducks in Montana?

I had to go to California last week — the Corporate Job was calling. My office in CA is right next to my favorite store in the world, the Ranch 99 Market. The Ranch 99 has many wonderful things including fresh shellfish in little tanks through which fresh water continually flows, a stupendous selection of condiments, and Hong Kong-Style roasted items. The Mighty Hunter wanted a roast duck, so the morning I was leaving I bought one, and with a significant amount of pantomime communicated to the man behind the counter that while I wanted the head and neck cut off, I wanted to keep them, and that while splitting the duck in half was necessary, I didn’t want it hacked into the bite-sized bits that are normal if you are going to eat the duck right away. Then I bought a roll of foil, and wrapped the duck up tightly, stuck it in a couple of gallon-sized ziploc bags I’d brought with me, and tied it in the Ranch 99 bag for good measure. It fit nicely into my handbag with only the faintest whiff of duck and star anise.

I was a little worried about the TSA checkpoint. The one here in Bozeman is notoriously strict and while a roasted duck is not a gel, or a liquid, who knows what they could decide. If they were hungry they could decide to confiscate my duck for lunch! But the San Jose Airport guys were great  — as I sent my bag through the x-ray I told them there was a duck in there.

"A duck?" The guy asked.
"Yeah," I said. "My boyfriend wanted a duck."
"They don’t have ducks in Montana?" he asked.
"Not Chinese roasted ducks," I said.
"Well, it’s not a gel or a liquid," the guy said looking in the monitor. "And it’s definitely a bird — Enjoy!"

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