Ceremonial Holiday Food …

Okay, I’ll admit it — I think Thanksgiving is the most boring holiday meal of the year. Perhaps it’s the residue of the Turkey Years, when Mom fed us on a couple of turkeys a month because it was a lot of meat for the dollar, or perhaps it’s just because it *is* the most boring meal of the year — but snore snore snore. Turkey. Stuffing. Mashed potatoes. A couple of sides — brussell sprouts or green beans. Cranberry sauce. Pie.

It’s inviolable. There are variations, sure — every year the magazines plop into my box full of variations, but essentially, you’re stuck with the same meal. For a couple of years there I fled the country — went to Paris for Thanksgiving (I could take a full 10-day vacation and only had to take 3 days off work.) I remember explaining to some French people that it’s a meal no one really likes, but everyone is forced, by the culture, to eat. They were French, a culture in which food ritual is so ingrained that although they were bewildered by the very American excess, and by the somewhat crude nature of the menu — they understood the concept of a shared national meal.

What saves Thanksgiving for me is the annual appearance of those ceremonial dishes that are really horrible, but without which it just doesn’t seem like Thanksgiving. My Aunt Daphne’s Baked Oyster Thing, for example. Beloved to her because it evokes her Maryland girlhood but translated to the Midwest in the 70s and 80s it appeared as a loose gratin of jarred oysters in cream, covered with smashed saltines. To a bunch of 10-15 year olds, it was everything horrible — slimy, wet, oystery and as I recall, a sort of unappealing grey color — but there it was, every year. And we were raised with the kind of manners that required us to take at least a bite, and to thank our beloved Aunt Daphne for the delicious Oyster Thing.

Or my mother’s standard — the Tomato Aspic Ring. This one is right out of some 1960s magazine. A jello mold made with half strawberry jello, half tomato juice into which is suspended a hash of onion, green pepper and celery that has been shredded in the Cuisinart. It’s unmolded onto a lettuce-lined plate, filled with curried mayonnaise and surrounded by a festive garland of canned artichoke hearts and hearts of palm. It’s ridiculous, and actually sort of refreshing, and when my mother tried to retire it, my cousin Denise specifically requested it’s return. It just didn’t feel like a holiday without it.

So folks, spill the beans — what are the ceremonial food items without which your Thanksgiving just wouldn’t feel complete?

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Garbage Dinner

When we were kids, we had dinner every Monday night with the Smiths. My mother was single and her friend Mrs. Smith’s husband was out of town on Mondays, and so we’d switch off — one week at our house, one week at theirs. It was always Garbage Dinner, meaning that Mom or Mrs. Smith used up whatever was left in the fridge. Garbage dinners were always an adventure — both my Mom and Mrs. Smith were both creative and also a little wacky — I mean, Mrs. Smith was the kind of person who went to Brazil on her honeymoon and stayed 12 years. She had a great dress-up box from when she’d been a model, and there was a period of two or three years where every time we went to the Smith’s the first thing I did was put on the strapless dress with the big blue cabbage roses and the matching sleeveless cape. It was a fabulous outfit. I remember riding the pony in that dress.

Anyhow, Garbage Dinner was an institution. At our house it usually meant Garbage Soup made from whatever chicken or turkey carcass was lurking in the back of the fridge, plus all the veggies that were getting wilty. At the Smiths we seemed to mostly get toast, custard (their ancient housekeeper Consuela only ate egg whites for breakfast, so there were always a lot of yolks by Monday night) and very strong milky tea. An Anglophile dinner. But you never knew what you might get, and that was half the fun.

Apparently the Waste Reduction Agency in Great Britain has determined that:

…one third of all food bought in Britain is thrown away – of which half is edible. Wrap will claim that this discarded food is a bigger problem than packaging, as the food supply chain accounts for a fifth of UK carbon emissions and decomposing food releases methane, the most potent of the greenhouse gases. Wasted food is estimated to cost each British household from £250 to £400 a year.

The government has started a new campaign to fight waste by reminding people that many of the lovely things about English food involve using up leftovers: bubble and squeak (cabbage and potatoes fried up with an onion), or bread and butter pudding. They’re also reminding people that meal and menu planning, plus simply cooking at home will not only reduce waste and greenhouse gasses, but will fight obesity and contribute to family relations.

I seem to be constitutionally unable to throw food away unless it’s really really gone bad, and I try my best not to let that happen. Getting rid of my plastic containers and using old pyrex refrigerator containers I bought on eBay seems to be helping — it’s easier when you can see everything. This blog post at the Guardian also has some good tips to avoid over-buying at the store (remember, all those 2-for-1 deals might not be your friend). And there’s this groovy Leftover Wizard that I’ve seen mentioned on a few websites. A few good cookbooks can also help — the Joy of Cooking has a lot of tips for leftovers, and a good primer about cooking technique (like this new one from Michael Ruhlman) can give you the skills you need when staring into the depths of your fridge wondering what you’re going to do with that bit of stew, the leftover squash, and half an onion.

And maybe get together with a friend. I know that both my mother and Mrs. Smith liked garbage dinners as much for the adult company and the fact that we’d all play with one another as they did for the chance to clean out the fridge once a week. We kids liked it because it was an adventure — sometimes dinner was weird, but more often than not it was weird in that fun, slightly subversive way that kids love.

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Making Bread — Not Just for SuperMoms

Over at Culinate there’s a nice piece by Zanne Miller about making bread with her daughters. What’s interesting is that it was the daughters who instigated the family bread-making, Miller herself admits to thinking that it was going to be too hard, or take too long, or be a pain. It’s a lovely piece about how it’s become part of their family routine.

Now that the weather has cooled off I’ve been making bread again — mostly the no-knead, although I need to go look up the some-knead hybrid I cribbed from Nancy Silverton last week (reminds me, I need to add wheat germ to my shopping list too). It’s not the time-consuming earth-mother chore that people tend to think it is — you can make a delicious loaf of nice clean bread that contains only flour, salt, water, and yeast in two or three short sessions of actual cooking. Bob del Grosso also has a simple bread recipe over at Hunger Artist, and here’s a story in the Times of London about why commercial bread makes you fat and feel terrible, while real bread doesn’t.

What I loved about the piece at Culinate is how Miller and her kids started out with breadmaking as a sort of craft project, and then found it creeping into their lives for the best of the Slow Food reasons — it was something fun they could do together, it gave them a chance to talk to one another while making dinner, and it gave the little girls a sense of mastery over a basic skill. I think that’s why I take such pleasure in making a loaf of bread once a week or so — even if it is just the dead-easy no-knead loaf — people have been making bread for a couple of thousand years, it’d be a shame to see it become some kind of esoteric lost skill.

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Takes a Licking …

 Takes a Licking ... I realized the other day while making paté that my KitchenAid mixer turned 35 this year — thirty five years this yellow baby has been churning out egg whites and cookie dough and cake batter. The last couple of years it’s repetoire has expanded to include pasta dough and grinding meat — it’s a very talented machine.

The KitchenAid belonged to my mother. She ordered it, with every attachment, the afternoon my father walked out. The story she tells is that she’d been wanting it, but he thought it was too expensive — so when he finally decided that he had to go, she called Marshall Fields before he could change the charge accounts and ordered the KitchenAid. We always thought this story was hilarious (sorry Dad). That year was so terrible — my parents broke up and our youngest brother had cancer and we had to move off our farm — but all that spring my mother cooked. Michael was so sick from the chemo that she baked bread and cookies and made soup from scratch and roasted chickens. Patrick and I were in heaven and so, I’ve always been very fond of the KitchenAid. It came into our lives at a dark time and made everything a little cheerier.

I learned to cook on this machine. I remember creaming the butter and sugar for chocolate chip cookies as a little kid, and a long Saturday in high school where I kept overbeating the whipping cream and turning it into butter. I’d ruin a pint, then have to get on my bike and ride to the store for more, then I broke it again. I think I went through four or five half-pints of cream before I figured it out.

When I was in grad school, my mother moved again and decided she was done with cooking. She sent me a big box of stuff – the KitchenAid and some old bread pans and an angel-food pan (that I don’t think I’ve ever used — hmmm), and so, for the past fifteen years I’ve dragged this heavy heavy machine from one house to another, from Davis to Salt Lake then back to the Bay Area then here, to Montana. I’ve made countless cakes for parties, and even that awful Christmas after Patrick died, the Crocquembouche That Wouldn’t Die. I love this machine. I love that it’s so well made that even after thirty five years I never have to wonder if it’s going to work, never have to wonder about that little engine that could in there. And I love that the attachments mean that I don’t have to have a whole pile of applicances — I can make pasta or grind meat — and maybe if Santa is good to me, I can make ice cream! I have all that beautiful milk these days ….

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30 Pounds of Moose Liver

“Do you want some moose liver?” the MH asked this weekend. “I’ve got 30 pounds of it.”

“Sure,” I answered. “I’ll take some — I’ll probably just make paté though.”  I mean, I was game for antelope liver last fall, but moose? Moose are enormous — the one that the MH’s son shot this weekend was six hundred pounds! And it wasn’t even a particularly large moose.

I have to admit, I have mixed feelings about the moose. The MH was so excited when Robbie won the tag in the lottery this year, and the photo he sent me of Robbie with his dead moose is a picture of a very happy kid who has just had a great hunting experience with his dad, and so I’m happy for them. But I don’t really see the point of hunting a moose — they’re not renowned for their deliciousness (unlike antelope, my favorite, or even elk which are quite tasty). And it’s not like we’re totally overrun with moose — although they are scary and ornery and will charge a dog or a person if annoyed (which seems to be their usual state of being). So, like I said, I’m ambivalent about the moose.

But on the other hand, the MH and his son had a real experience out there on Saturday morning, and spent a couple of good father-son weekends before that hunting up the moose — and Robbie now has a set of antlers for his wall, and we’re all going to be eating a lot of moose this winter. Because if there’s anything I know about the MH, it’s that he isn’t a trophy hunter,  and he hates waste. Moose tacos? Wonder what those will taste like …

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